I cleaned. My entire house. For six hours. I guess I was hoping for relief, and I somewhat received that...for those of you that don't know, I have a minor case of OCD. At least that's what I've been diagnosed with. I just think I'm particular. Which isn't really all that bad. So what if I have different sets of acceptable numbers for different things? It's not terrible to have to make lists of everything, right? At least then my thoughts are on paper and not in my head. And it's just organized to have list formats for all the different list... Is it so bad that I want a sparkly house? It doesn't stay that way, but on nights like tonight I can't deal with the creepy crawly feeling on the inside because everything is not in its place. Yes, it's kind of a pain to have to have everything in a precise (down to the inch) location, but at least I always know where everything is. And now after hours of scrubbing and organizing and wiping everything down I feel a sense of relief. A contentment with the world. Each thing in this house feels like it's connected to a part of my mind, and if the house is it of order I can't be expected to properly function. Then how do I sorry out the thoughts in my head? That's honestly why I haven't posted in a while. It's been too much. Too many happenings, too many conversations. Thoughts just everywhere. In circles, around three bend, over yonder and lost in the woods. But now. Now my house is clean and I think we should begin.
Who are you, when you're walking through the door?
Who are you, when you face this world alone?
Who are you when the tears start to flow?
Feel like you can't take anymore...
Let the darkness fill you in...
Showing emotions you can't hide...
The weight of the world is on your shoulders
Sights and sounds go all around
Thoughts are overflowing from your eyes
(Don't hide from me, can't you see
I know who you really are
Through the years, face your fears
I believe in you
All those times, all those rhymes
We made precious memories
Music flew and our love grew
I belong to you
Baby, I'll be there...)
What happens when the world stops turnin?
What happens when you can't stop yearning?
What happens when you're far from what you need?
Held hand for reassurance...
Search for a miracle occurring...
Have faith and hold on to me...
Feel your own heart there barely burnin
You never know what could come true
Every journey has it's ups and downs
()
When will you see how much you mean to me?
When will you resolve this controversy?
When will you see you're killing me?
Every day these feelings grow...
I'm caught up in love and misery...
Please don't be the death of me...
How you can't see, I'll never know
This feels like a game, a battlefield
I'm losing this battle, so plain to see
(x2)
Baby just let me be there for you...
